Something to think about...

One of my motivations for writing a blog was to provide myself with a forum to sound off about news and current events. For example, the day that the Casey Anthony trial reached a verdict, I wished I had a blog, because I had more than a few things to say about it... It's more fun to write about my little garden, my DIY projects around the house, and the more light hearted subjects in life, but sometimes, I need a place to put my opinion out there in the world, regardless of whether or not someone is reading it. So here it goes...

I recently read this article written by Ashley Judd, and it got me thinking about one of my pet peeves - when women pick on women. I know we all have found ourselves making snide comments here and there, but at the end of the day, it is tragic that we perpetuate negativity and in a sense contribute to the unrealistic standards of beauty and perfection that have become acceptable in our Hollywood obsessed, reality TV saturated, media driven society. It's crazy that as women, we make it so a woman can't win either way - she's either criticized for 'letting herself go' and trying to age graciously, or hounded for having work done in an effort to prolong their youthful looks. In a culture that values youth over wisdom, skin-deep beauty over depth of character, and illusion over reality, the last thing we need is to be picking on each other!

 

And it's bigger than just beauty and body image - women are being criticized for their choices regarding career and family as well. This article caught my attention this morning, as Hilary Rosen describes Ann Romney as having 'actually never worked a day in her life'. Now I don't know Ann Romney, and this is not about politics (because that's an entirely different rant, although somewhat related, as our political and electoral process seems to thrive on this same cannibalistic concept, attempting to make candidates look better and more appealing to the public by trying to criticize and denigrate the opposition, but I digress...), but I know enough to know that raising five children is more than a day's work! Ann Romney's decision to raise her five children is a valid career choice, as much as Hilary Rosen's decision to pursue her career, as a political strategist or whatever it is that she does, and these kinds of conversations in the media affect the way young girls see their future, their bodies, their lives. Never mind the fact that today's news brings reports that Hilary herself cited wanting to spend more time with her children as a reason for leaving a job a few years ago, her criticism and dismissal of the daily hard work of millions of at-home mothers in America is symptomatic of a bigger issue. In a world where every woman I know struggles with feeling like she doesn't quite measure up sometimes, there seems to be some kind of twisted side of human nature that tries to use comparison and criticism to make ourselves feel better by tearing down someone else. 

What if we were all a little bit kinder to each other, and ourselves? What if we tried to change 'The Conversation', not just about our bodies or our faces, but about the way we measure our value? I doubt all the suffragettes and feminists and other women who fought for centuries to afford us the opportunities and choices and rights that we have today did so only to have us turn on each other. I'm working on silencing my inner 'mean girl' voice, speaking up against attitudes and ignorance that are pervasive in day to day life, and changing the inner dialogue that starts when I look in the mirror, or at other people. I'm turning 31 in a few weeks, and I'm okay with the little wrinkles forming under my eyes, but I'm dyeing the silvery strands that are waging war on my brunette locks - don't judge me for it! And I'll do my best not to judge you too :)

*** If you haven't read these articles, take a minute to (especially the essay written by Ashley Judd) - it's good to think about these things, and the way they influence how we think and how we live... and how our daughters will live. And for a healthy dose of reality, take a second to watch this video - we live in a world with a distorted view of reality and beauty - it helps to remember that in moments that leave you feeling like you just don't measure up.